Strutting like the king of the walk,

All the chick’s will blush and squawk,

Conspiracy theorists 

Know better than to talk,

It’s a middle class, good life urban disaster

That he brought back from the farm in the back of his Astra,

Look at this too cool for school rooster,

He knows how to cock a doodle do ya,

If its 5am or he decides to half past two ya,

When he will strike who can tell?

He can sound the alarm  at any decibel,

I asked the neighbours and they said well,

We don’t like to mention it for fear of an upset

Just how chicken do you want to get?

A farm animal doesn’t make a good pet,

Ask any well intentioned vet,

Don’t try and roast this bird it’s true,

What else are you going to doodle do?

It starts with chickens and ends in a zoo,

So if it’s just between me and you

We need to nip this in the bud,

As any decent neighbour would,

We do this for the greater good,

I don’t care if its from decent stock,

Or if the coop has got a decent lock,

You need to know that when I knock,

With the noise abatement lock and stock

Got my foot in the door that you can’t block

Don’t want to rock the boat or mock,

But before the chickens run amok,

Before the ground starts to rock with the shock

Can we please talk about

Your cock